It is all in there.
The true history of the CIA’s involvement with Lee Harvey Oswald,
and the name of the island on which Amelia Earheart spent the last twenty-three years of her life.
The one common household ingredient that would make cold fusion possible,
and the recipe for Kentucky Fried Chicken.
The eighteen missing minutes of the Watergate tapes,
and the secret to healthier, younger-looking skin.
There are the cures for cancer,
and male pattern baldness,
and the common cold.
Atlantis is there,
and the stone that killed the dinosaurs
right alongside Jimmy Hoffa
and the details of the secret Mormon plan to take over the world.
It’s all in there,
all in Mitt Romney’s tax returns
which he will take
to his grave.